My wedding speech

I FINALLY have my computer back; F***N Volante took about 6 weeks to fix it. Thanks M for lending me your old computer in the interim. Much appreciated.

And very excitingly I have access to my files - so here is what I know you've all been waiting for... my notes for my wedding speech.
Try not to get too excited.
And feel free to skim through the thankyous at the start; the good (or at least better) material is towards the end.
I freestyled a little while up on stage; but I think I kept pretty close to my notes.

Samizdat7's speech at his wedding on 18 March 2007

Thanks
M and I would like to thank a very large number of people. First, our parents for hosting our wedding and for making today possible. My new sister L, who is responsible for our amazing invitations and for so much more. E, T, M, V, P and R for their invaluable help with logistics today. My brother D for his help in making today a success.

L and D for being supportive and beautiful bridesmaids for M. I would like to thank L and A for their speech, and also to note that their time will come. In fact for A it is imminent; she will be married in May. L may keep us waiting a little longer. M and L for their assistance as MCs. M, L, D and D for keeping the Chuppah from blowing away. M, J and D for being called up at Shule with me. And of course I must thank J for bringing M and I together on Cup Day in 2004.

Guests
• D & K from Amsterdam – after travelling more than 40 hours and missing their London connection due to fog– nevertheless I hope that our wedding is a welcome respite from an Amsterdam Winter
• W all the way from Kabul, Afghanistan – I’m sure she’s welcoming the opportunity to leave the bodyguards at home and attend a social function without the presence of an armed militia
• M & M from Tokyo – I haven’t seen you in years and I’m very happy that you could make it here today
• S from Brisbane – thankyou for making it down to Melbourne for our wedding
• A & J, L, M & R, K, J and E & M from Sydney – well the obvious comment is that today they’re being given the opportunity to experience one of the Major Events Melbourne is famous for

My family
• As many of you will know, I have followed my parents into the law. Proof that some people never learn, no matter how clear the lesson.
• I feel very fortunate to have found a profession that I love and in which I hope to build a long career. I thank my parents for giving me the opportunity to obtain an excellent education and for instilling in me a belief in justice, integrity and the importance of reputation.
• My parents are crazy about M; which is fantastic, except when I get the feeling they are much more excited when they hear she is coming to visit than they are when they hear I am coming.
• Thankyou H and T for making today happen and for the love and support shown to me throughout my life.
• Thankyou also to D and his beautiful wife K – I am very very happy that you are able to be here to share this special day with us.

M’s family
• Have been made to feel very welcome both by M’s immediate family and by all of her extended family.
• From the first family function I attended – Pesach at the R’s in 2005 – I have been warmly welcomed.
• When I told S I planned to ask his daughter to marry me at C’s first birthday party last year he avoided the obvious temptation to make me sweat, for which I will be eternally grateful.
• Thankyou all

Commitment
This weekend M & I have made a number of commitments to each other.

In plain English, a form of language for which lawyers often strive but rarely achieve, M I promise that I will love you, that I will be there for you, that I will work with you to solve any problems that come up along our journey and that I will be true to you. And that we will have a lot of fun.

I am so excited about building a happy, Jewish home with you and about creating a family together and of course about the adventures we will have together over the years.

M
Apart from the obvious – that she’s beautiful, smart and a lot of fun – what can I say about M?
• Never met anyone like her
• As you’ve heard, we met on a blind date. Yes it does happen.

• Less than 2 months after we met, M and I headed off together for a holiday in New Zealand. Obviously it was too early in this new relationship to show my true colours, so I said yes to whatever was suggested.
• This explains why on that trip I somehow ended up blackwater rafting, hiking the Tongariro Crossing, kayaking in Able Tasman National Park and staying in a youth hostel for the first time. And not just any youth hostel. For some reason M organised for us to stay at “Extreme Backpackers” in Turangi
• I really should tell you about my blackwater rafting experience on that trip. When M suggested it in the safety of my apartment in Balaclava, I said ‘yes, sounds like a great idea’. Of course I had no real idea what it involved.
As a lifetime claustrophobe, I hadn’t appreciated that blackwater rafting means dressing in a wetsuit and floating for a couple of hours down an underwater river in the inner tube of a truck tyre. In a cave. I think my veneer of cool was somewhat tarnished when I started hyperventilating as I clambered down and realised that the last of the natural light was vanishing somewhere behind me.
Nevertheless, going back (and humiliating myself further) seemed somehow worse than continuing. I made it through the next hour and a half by breathing shallowly and refusing to contemplate what was happening.
Eventually we made it back out. And I announced that never, under no circumstances would I ever be doing anything like it ever again.
• Of course the next year we ended up hiking through Khao Sok National Park in Thailand. A rainforest teeming with life. Dangerous, terrifying wildlife. After a further exploration of the true nature of terror we made it back to our accommodation, which consisted of a treehouse where the wildlife was just slightly further at bay.
Luckily it wasn’t until after we returned to our treehouse that I read more about the park and the leopards, tigers, bears, cobras, pythons, vipers, scorpions, tarantulas and other members of the animal kingdom to be found there.
• M has introduced me to jogging. Despite a couple of years of half-hearted attempts, the highlight of which was a 10km funrun (aka a deathmarch) M has steadfastly refused to make fun of my speed, style or stamina. For which I will always be grateful.

• M has boundless enthusiasm and energy and is the most positive-minded person I’ve ever met.
Despite 2 ½ years of trying, I haven’t yet managed to break her spirit. And I hope I never do.
• It is hard to avoid clichés at a time like this and I’m not going to try too hard; sometimes they really are appropriate.
• M and I are very different but our differences, generally, bring us together.
• She sees the positive side of everything, she loves life, she gets things done and she is incapable of accepting ‘no’ as an answer.
• She encourages and supports me to pursue my passions and embraces my idiosyncracies.
• M's confidence, vitality, optimism, intelligence and support give me confidence and mean a lot to me. She challenges me and she loves me, and together M and I are capable of much more than we would be separately. I love her and look forward to sharing many, many more adventures with her over the years ahead.

A long week

(almost) the end of a very long week - running 3 cases in a week is exhausting...

wedding photos

Anyone not already overdosed on the M&T wedding is welcome to check out a fairly random selection of photos posted up on photobucket.

A very proud moment

Just checked out the photos Lucas posted of my bucks night... Am very very proud to report that one of the photos has been deleted for violating Photobucket's terms of service.

Wow, it must have been an even better night than I remember.

How can I be the last person to blog about it? It was my f*n wedding!

Since writing my last post, I've become aware that both Lucas and Emilie have blogged (at length) about my wedding last weekend.

Lucas' post has its charms - I enjoyed the reprint of his speech - but Emilie's post is by far the better of the two, as it contains absolutely no snarky comments or allegations of totalitarian repression.

In fact I think it is worth reprinting a few short extracts from Emilie's post:

M was escorted through the gardens to the Chuppah by her parents.
Her dress was divine.
It was a golden cream sheath that had gold glass beading with thick straps.
The veil and the material of the Chuppah echoed each other.
It really was a golden experience.
The bride and groom were smiling and so was every single guest.

T and M are so different
She's a really out-doorsy engineer who'd traveled all over the world in a hardcore kind of a way and is really into things like sky-diving, rock climbing and black water kayaking
T is a Barrister, uber-educated gentle person who is into interesting things like Korean cinema.
He's a top guy.
And I love that they thrive on each other’s differences and are eager to learn, understand and experience each other’s passions.
They are a perfect human compliment.

What a great wedding!

T has restored my faith that not all Jewish boys in Melbourne are complete knobs!

In case anyone's curious, both Emilie and Lucas have included a few photos of the wedding.

The big day

M & I were married last Sunday 18 March 2007 at the Royal Botanic Gardens in Melbourne, under a big old gum tree in front of the lake. It was a perfect day and a perfect location.

The wedding was followed by an (awesome) celebration at the Observatory Cafe at the Gardens... dancing the hora, a bbq dinner, various funny & short speeches, drinking, more dancing, a Swollen Members track, then back to our house with about 20 friends to keep partying ... we had a great night and I hope those of my readers who joined us for the wedding and celebrations did too.

And we followed this up with a few days in Red Hill, which was great. Lots of relaxing, a hike along the Two Bays track and a spectacular private picnic at Montalto winery.

More wedding minutiae to follow, including possibly some photos and an edited extract of my speech.

Double chivas on the rocks - my bucks' night @ Melbourne Wine Room

(self-)censored almost to a crisp

Well, I survived my bucks' night (query appropriateness of the apostrophe). And early reports are emerging - BB, the man for whom the phrase unreliable narrator was coined, provides a version of events here

I planned to write my impressions of the evening but after some minutes work have given up the task as impossible due to haziness of memory, the necessity for self-censorship and the varied humiliations involved.

wedding aarrggghh

am in the middle of wedding planning at the moment and not loving it. I am actually optimistic that the big day will be great; it's the 80-odd days leading up to it that i expect to suck. everyone has opinions. most of them are incompatible. so much pressure pushing towards a generic wedding. M has started reading wedding magazines. feeling totally suffocated. deep breath.

you hear about the guys who remain totally uninvolved and just turn up on the day. i'd love to be one of those people, but unfortunately i'm not.

Nevertheless remain very excited about the mid-year trip to Israel and Europe.....